Pandemic Practicing/Productivity is Hard
It’s been over a year since I wrote an article for my own website. Which is silly because I’ve had plenty of time on my hands during 2020.
Oh, are you reading this in a year in which you don’t know what happened in 2020? Well, kids. Let Auntie Hilary tell you the story of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic in which millions of people around the world lost their jobs, thousands of businesses closed, and hundreds of thousands lost their lives. We’re still in the midst of things as I write this. Everyone has had a rough time with this, but as I’m a performing artist, I can only speak to that standpoint.
My trio had every performance after March 17, 2020 canceled, postponed, or deferred. Poof. Nothing on the calendar. No reason to be productive. Nothing to look forward to. I’m not going to lie - things were pretty dark.
But here and there, different organizations gave us things to look forward to. First, it was Manifest Boston who gave us a reason, a platform, and an audience for us to do our first Fruit Flies Like a Banana: Virtual Style. Shortly following that, we did Virtual Style for Orlando Fringe’s virtual festival and the Orlando Sentinel awarded us Co-Best of the Fest. Since then, we’ve done many more virtual performances and even started a monthly live-stream that is designed to keep us creating and innovating despite not being near each other. We even premiered a new lecture/demonstration yesterday for students at The Juilliard School entitled Virtual Performance: Vibrant Possibilities. In October, the Oklahoma Flute Society asked me to still be their Guest Artist for their virtual flute fair and I created a virtual recital that I was really excited about. I was proud to share works by living composers as well as works that I’ve reimagined. I got to speak with the composers during the show, utilize Zoom’s technology, showcase my mom’s custom costumes, and did my first solo recital since 2009. It was awesome.
However, I’ll admit that I’ve had more dark and down days than hopeful and positive. Most days I’ll complete my to-do list of dishes, laundry, play with the dog, make dinner, then sit on the couch until my husband comes home. Tonight, I was thinking about how “set practice goals” has been on my to-do list for a couple weeks and I suddenly remembered my own advice that I shared when I took over Powell Flutes’s Instagram in December. I realized that maybe if I write it on my website, maybe I can follow it. So, here goes:
Step 1: get the flute out of the case and lay on the floor for long tones. Why? Because I don’t feel like holding my arms up and it’s comfortable down there and this? This is a success.
Step 2: Mental check-in! Am I ready to practice?
UGGGGGH.
That’s a no.
Step 3: Play the flute without feeling like I’m practicing. For me, that means play with the dog while I happen to be playing the flute.
Step 4: Mental check-in! Am I ready to practice?
Maaaaaybe?
That’s a no. New tactic!
Step 5: Play something else badly in a weird position to make myself laugh
Step 6: Mental check-in! Am I ready to practice?
Yeah. Yeah I think I can do this.
The bottom line is to be kind to yourself. If you can practice effectively for an hour today, yahtzee! If you get the flute out and do some long tones on the floor today, excellent! Or if you just remind yourself that you really ARE a flute player, fabulous. These are all successes and they are all a step forward.
Today, I will finish this article, post it on my website, link it on my social media accounts, and then try to learn the first page of a new piece that has been calling my name for a year or two. If I do it, yahtzee. If I just manage to finish this article, excellent. But dammit, times are hard when there isn’t much to look forward to, but I am still a flute player.